The beginning of a new month...a beautiful June day...is there anything so rare? Went for a very long walk, breathing in the air and enjoying the people and dogs I saw along the way. I fasted from sugar today and realized again how I calm down all over when I do not indulge. Sugar sets me on a mental tilt that makes me feel "off" at every level...not worth it.
A truth about myself came over me today like a wave of water. A mental veil was lifted. I struggle at times with great bouts of shyness. I can so easily isolate myself. Then, I become lonely and I hide and eat. I have often chosen food over people because food takes much less work and it does not reject me when I feel vulnerable, fragile or shy. However, the down side of food is that it cannot and should not replace intimacy and fellowship. I have given food a place which it does not rightly own. I am learning to replace food with people. People take a lot more work but the payoff is worth it. I need the fellowship more than the food. I need appropriate boundaries when necessary. Life is good. June is beautiful and so are the good people I know and cherish.
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